Its been a breezy, overcast day here in Champaign with a temperature hovering right around 70. As much as I have loved being here over the summer, there's been a feeling of almost disbelief surrounding it. It's definitely not what I had expected from the summer, yet college hasn't really been what I thought it would be either.

Don't get me wrong, I've met some awesome people, had some pretty good experiences, some bad, yet it isn't what I was expecting and I don't feel like I've gotten what I'd wanted so far. Nothing really is what you expect though. It all just kinda hit me all of the sudden, just as Alfonso Soriano can attest (he just got drilled by a pitch in the top of the 6th out in Pittsburgh). Sometimes I guess it is good to have a little bit of a change of pace.

Instead of spending my summer back with my family or up at a summer house in Michigan, I'm sitting in a dark apartment by myself looking out at an empty, rundown parking lot, complete with a dumpster and beat up wooden box others would call a shed. I can't help but feeling there's something I'm missing. I almost feel like I've been living for a while with someone watching me and I am sufficiently succeeding in failing to impress.

Well whatever it is, hopefully it starts to change. Along with the amount I have been studying, working, or sleeping, it is really nice to finally be able to sit here and think and write. Sometimes that's all I can do, but maybe it will help out a little bit. Below is a song that I have been playing on repeat for a few days that resonates just how down I've been.

The Long Winters - The Sound of Coming Down